Sunday, September 26, 2010

I need to vent or cry, or do something!


OK so i'm going to vent in this post because, well just because i really need to.So this might be all over the place and just plain old might not make sense.  I don't really have any one to talk to so i guess ill get my thoughts and what not into the cyberspace~! As everyone knows i have 2 kids, 5 and 19 months. My 5 year old is in school daily till 4 and it has been awesome, because otherwise he would be driving me crazy, Is that a bad mom thing to say? I don't know what it is with me this past year or so. I feel crazy i cant keep cool i feel like i scream and yell all day long. My 19 month old is so spoiled that is becoming a problem now. If she doesn't get what she wants she will carry on for hours if i let her. Like most kids they can be redirected and would forget about whatever the problem was, well not my kid. She will fight and fight for whatever it is she wants for days. Well its causing lots of issues with me and my boyfriend. He is home in the mornings and works at night. while he is home in the morning, half the time we don't talk even talk because he gets mad that i'm yelling and screaming and that the baby is crying and whining. He gets to sleep in till whenever he wants to get up and when he gets up he lays on the couch and watches TV. If i say something to him that he doesn't like he freaks out and takes whatever i say the wrong way and puts words in my mouth. So i rarely say what i feel and just keep everything bottled up inside! I'm really at my wits end. I'm not sure how to deal with things anymore. All i want to do some days is just cry. I want to cry because i feel like a failure most days, like what am i doing wrong? and i really just a bad parent? Is it me or is it him? I feel like if he doesn't like what i'm doing with the kids then why doesn't he step in? He gets more frustrated than i do most times. I love him to death, and sometimes i just feel like hes here just cause of the kids, and not cause of me.

Ok well i actually feel a little better and have lots to do today, maybe make an apt this week to get some happy pills! lol well actually i dont think im joking about that.

well i hope everyone else is gonna have a good sunday, Im counting down till bedtime and school tmrw!

P.s. If this didnt make sense im sorry :/


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4 comments:

  1. Sounds like you have a lot on your plate. Just get away for a few hours. My son who is 22 months dose the same thing your 19 month old dose. When he gets into one of those fits I put his butt in bed and don't get him out tell he is done fussing. If he goes on for hours then oh well. That may make me a bad mother to some, but I am not going to let him control this household or me with his fitts.

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  2. I'm with the Frantic Mother. Let your little one cry it out, in another room. It will be hell for the first few times, BUT it WILL work. Happy pills don't always work the way you want them to. I was on them for about four years and never found that "happy place" I thought they would take me to. Is there a place you can take your little girl for the day every once in a while? You do need some time to yourself; that is very important. If you don't make it happen, it probably won't . This isn't being selfish; it's call self preservation! Good Luck!

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  3. Hugs to you. I hope your week is going better. My kids are hard to re-direct, too. Ignoring them is hard (and sometimes a SLOW process), but it does eventually work. :) Following from Baby Blogger Thursday.

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  4. Oh man, sorry you're going through that. I'm reading a discipline book right now called "The Happiest Toddler on the Block". At first, I thought his principles and suggestions were a little ridiculous, but now I'm coming to realize that they actually work. He basically says that you need to bend down and look them in the eye like you're really listening (while they're flipping out), let them cry for about 10 seconds and nod your head, then repeat what they're feeling (Oh, Susie is really mad. No go to store!). They will typically calm down and start paying attention to what you're doing. Then, you say something like "...but we're going to go home right after the store. Do you want to help mommy pick out some [blank]?" I was totally shocked because I felt like an idiot talking like that... but it works pretty well. Anyway, good luck!!

    I'm your newest follower from Thursday blog hops. Looking forward to reading more. Mine is http://www.nestingwithniall.blogspot.com. Hope you'll stop by :)

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